In Honor of a Vibrant Life

When I tell the story of Lille Bønne, I usually start with July of 2023 when Phil and I joked about what we would do if we bought a church. And then swiftly bought a church. If I’m going deep in the story, I’ll talk about my discontent with my career, my longing for community, and my desire to create a connected community for my children. But the story really begins in August of 2022, when my husband and I traveled to Nepal for the wedding of one of my best friends in the whole world, Shreya Thapa.

Shreya was one of the rare people that I instantly cliqued with. One of those people that I remember the moment I first saw her, her energy was so strong. We were connected from the jump, and not just about silly things (although there was plenty of that). We shared and understood each other’s deepest longings: to feel seen and understood; for the true sense of belonging that can only come with complete openness and complete care; for the feeling and sense of community that’s an amalgamation of people and place. 

We were both trying to fill these longings in all the wrong ways, like you do. But I think we were both starting to figure it out. She, admittedly, way ahead of me. 

We maintained a friendship for nearly 20 years. We had plenty of ebbs and flows and some periods of neglect, as close friendships often do. But whenever we reconnected, it was always as if no time had passed at all and our connection grew stronger. She was a true soul sister. 

So when the opportunity came to be part of her wedding in her home country of Nepal, there was no way I was going to miss it. She was so excited to bring Mark and me into her home, her culture, her food, her art, her chosen family.  

The community that she built and I got to experience briefly in Nepal was so beautiful. So unabashedly caring for each other. So open. So full of love and mutual care. She was doing it! She was creating the life she had always longed for. And she was knocking it out of the park. 

Shreya Thapa and Yugal Sherchan wedding fam. Thapa + Sherchan = Thapchan <3

She and her husband, Yugal, took their community creation to the next level, when they went on to open their own community living room, of sorts, called Thapchan Exchange. Pretty much at the exact same time that we were starting to work on Lille Bønne. 

Shreya passed away from an acute and rapid illness last week. The pain of her loss feels so profound because she was so profound. So full of love and life.

I’m sharing this with you, through Lille Bønne, because I want to create the same kind of vibrant, open, caring community that Shreya was constantly creating. I want to be my most authentic self in everything I do here. And I want to give everyone I share this space with the freedom to be their most authentic selves, too. I want to share with this community that we’re building together. And there is nothing I can authentically share right now that doesn’t include Shreya. 

So, rather than wait until I’m feeling better (maybe never, grief is big) and then jump back online like nothing happened, I wanted to share this with you. I want to live a more vibrant, open, and caring life in honor of my dear friend.

In January, Shreya wrote this message to a family that spent time at Thapchan Exchange during their travels. It is what I would want to share back with her now, and with all of you when you come to Lille Bønne.

“Wherever you go next, wherever you end up, until you come back again to us–may you go in peace, may you continue to grow your family of love, and may the light shine as bright around you as it does within and inside all of you–thank you for sharing yourselves with us!

Until we meet again, with all the love and all the best wishes, 
The Thapchans”

Shreya Thapchan, August 2022